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The usual story. The strategy meeting is coming to an end. There are a number of initiatives that need to be implemented by the end of the quarter. Everyone agrees with the work plan and each of those present says that he will contribute to its implementation. However, when the quarter comes to an end, it turns out that only a small fraction of what was planned has been accomplished. And the point is not that the employees are bad, and not that they worked carelessly. The problem was that none of them felt any actual personal responsibility. Are you familiar with this situation?

People often find it difficult to differentiate between overall responsibility and individual responsibility. The difference is simple. Many people may be responsible for facilitating a task or initiative. However, personal responsibility rests with one person, whose work will be evaluated upon completion of the project.

People with high level individual responsibility is extremely difficult to find, since it comes from within, and is not assigned to a person by superiors, you yourself must decide that you accept and bear it. Below are eight habits that people who are not afraid of individual responsibility make part of their daily lives.

1. They accept responsibility. When responsibility is forced upon people, they often try to get rid of it or openly resist it. People with developed individual responsibility willingly accept it and actively take on the implementation of the tasks assigned to them. They do everything possible to ensure that once an initiative has been entrusted to them, no one else has to worry about carrying it out.

2. They don't make excuses. An objective debriefing is useful after the project is completed, and not during its implementation. If “here and now” something goes wrong, you should not look for those to blame. It's a waste of time and energy. We need to look for a way out of this situation.

People with high personal responsibility do not try to justify their own mistakes or inactions, and do not look for scapegoats. They also do not try to come out clean, citing external influences. Instead, they conduct rigorous analysis and solve problems as they arise.

3. They meet deadlines. What is the use of completing tasks if the result of the work was expected much earlier and has become practically useless? People with high individual responsibility recognize that every project has time value and that punctuality is a necessary condition achieving the goal. The trust that others have in them is based, among other things, on their efficiency and desire not to waste a single minute of time, be it their own or someone else's.

4. They are the masters of their own destiny. Every project has problems. However, proper planning coupled with a positive and pragmatic approach can overcome virtually any obstacle. The psychology of the victim is alien to a person with a developed sense of individual responsibility. He does not expect scrutiny or control from others, but instead works proactively and conscientiously with the team to complete the project as quickly as possible.

5. They control their feelings. During execution important project emotional stress sometimes it goes off scale. People with high individual responsibility know that negative emotions may harm productivity. They don't lose control of their feelings and don't let unfortunate setbacks or emotional colleagues get in the way of completing their tasks. They decisively attack each problem, targeting its root cause, and do not allow an atmosphere of uncertainty and uncertainty to arise.

6. They manage expectations. Uncertainty leads to inaction. People with high personal responsibility are clearly aware of what needs to be done and when. They think through the project carefully and provide you with a plan you can rely on. If an issue arises, they evaluate it, resolve it, and proactively reach out to all stakeholders to ensure everyone is aware of and agrees to the corrected outcome.

7. They interact with others. Only a few significant tasks can be accomplished by one person. People with developed personal responsibility are excellent at using the resources available to them. They maximize the potential of all the people at their disposal, attracting them, stimulating them to work productively and empowering them, thanks to which they make a significant contribution to the final result.

IN Lately You can hear the term “responsible person” quite often. This has become almost a mandatory requirement in job advertisements. Despite the fact that not a single explanatory dictionary uses these words side by side when defining a person’s personal qualities, many give this phrase great value. What is hidden behind it, and how to become a responsible person?

A person’s responsibility is understood as his desire and ability to give. own strength, money, time to achieve a certain goal. Sometimes this also refers to the ability of an individual to be responsible for the actions he has committed. More specifically, to be a responsible person means to be someone who is able to take on any obligations and do everything possible to ensure that they are fulfilled.

In order to earn the right to be called a responsible person, you must learn to take responsibility for all aspects of your life, such as health, obligations, relationships. Only you can force yourself to reconsider your life and change what you don’t agree with and what doesn’t suit you. This can only be done when you learn to take full responsibility.

Developing a sense of responsibility is quite difficult, but, as with any other character trait, it can be trained.

The first step is to make responsibility the most important of your values. You must realize that it is a social skill necessary to improve your life. For example, learning to take responsibility for family life, you will understand that you are the cause of the disagreements and conflicts that arise in the family, which means that you also have to fight them.

You can practice personal responsibility by asking yourself what problems and difficulties you are currently experiencing and what you have done to overcome them. Answering the question about how to become responsible, we can say that best results you can achieve only when in your desires, instead of the words “I want,” you learn to use the question: “What can I do to achieve what I want?” or “What should I have done to be fully responsible for my actions?”
It is much easier to train a sense of responsibility if you involve an assistant or partner who can encourage or punish you depending on your results.

Your partner should be such that he can correctly assess your progress and control all areas of your life. It will give you additional motivation so that you do not break the rules you have established and do not put off fulfilling your obligations until later.

Relationships with your partner can be distant. To do this, you can send him detailed reports containing information about your progress at certain intervals. Such reports can be sent 2 times a week, this will be quite enough. Even greater efficiency can be achieved if you develop a system of rewards and punishments for untimely or, accordingly, timely completion of goals and reporting.

Once you learn to do this without reminders for 21 days, it will turn into a healthy habit that will make your life better.

Knowing that how to become responsible person, and having put some effort into this, you will very soon begin to notice that your life and the opinions of those around you have begun to change in a positive direction.

The term “responsible person” has become very popular nowadays. It can even be seen in job advertisements as a mandatory requirement for a candidate. As a personality trait, the word “responsibility” cannot be found even in large explanatory dictionaries. However, many people have their own opinions regarding its meaning. Characteristics of a responsible person are a very subjective concept. Let's figure out what responsibility is.

Responsibility is the ability and desire of an individual to invest his time, money or part of his freedom to achieve a certain goal. IN in some cases the term may also include the ability to be punished for one's actions. IN similar situations responsibility implies a certain fairness of the individual in how he treats himself. A person agrees that his actions deserve some blame, and is ready to take responsibility for them.

This term is quite ancient, it is found in many languages. Interestingly, in all cases it is associated with the ability to react or respond to something, and is also associated with a certain punishment. Initially, punishment was a completely tangible concept. For example, murder was punishable by some compensation for moral and material damage.

Today sense of responsibility is more associated with a person’s ability to keep his word, as well as make decisions in which the person acts not only in his own interests. The concept of responsibility is much broader than the term “obligation”. However, the second is an integral part of the first.

Responsibility occurs only when there is a relationship between two or more people. That is, such a thing as responsibility does not exist outside of society. Then when we're talking about that a person responsibly does something specifically for himself is still implied personal quality formed in society. There is a clear direct relationship between the closeness of a person's connection with other people and the likelihood that a person will be responsible. For this quality to develop, you need experience in responsible relationships and developed reflection of activity. Because this property can only be found in a truly active person.

Responsibility, like self-criticism, an essential quality that should be present in any leader. However, in our time, an incorrect attitude towards the concept of a leader has been formed. Everywhere and everywhere the idea is being promoted that every person should strive to be in front or at the head of some group of people. Unfortunately, such propaganda is a trap for responsible people who lack the skills and inclinations of management. Because of this, they have to suffer and lose their health, doing something that, in fact, is not their path. This is especially true for young men who develop a number of illnesses at an early age and experience serious stress at work.

Therefore, responsibility is social concept, and it is supported by some actions. At the same time, the level of responsibility should be formed by each individual specifically for himself, taking into account his capabilities.

How to become a responsible person

Responsibility is a skill that can be acquired with some effort. To understand how to become more responsible, it is necessary to consider the existing levels of assessment of this quality. Ask someone you know to analyze you according to the criteria below. Often, after such an assessment, many questions arise, the answers to which will be useful. Since it is not easy to become responsible right away, an external independent view will be very valuable, about which we'll talk below.

Levels of Personal Responsibility

• Zero responsibility implies that you play the role of a dependent. You completely remove yourself from any responsibility because you believe that someone else's care for you is a self-evident responsibility. Such a person does not think about how to become more responsible, because he is comfortable in his current position.
• The first level puts you in the position of a performer. Such a person practices the principle “work is not a wolf.” Usually such people do not do anything until they are told to do something. If the performer is not pushed to take some action, then he will remain at the starting point.
• The second level of responsibility implies that a person takes the position of a specialist. Such people do their work efficiently, but do not put their soul into it. They view their occupation as a way to earn money and nothing more. You should not expect any initiative from such a person. Such people are not interested in helping or suggesting anything. You need to understand that a specialist can leave you at any time if he finds more profitable occupation. Such people quite often use the phrase “I don’t get paid for this,” thereby limiting themselves from doing things that are not included in the list of their powers.
• The third level is occupied by the responsible employee. Even if such a person is currently does not perform its functions well enough, it strives to develop and acquire the necessary skills. Therefore, in the future, the responsible employee will certainly become a professional in his field. The results of his work are important to him, he is quite proactive and open to sharing experiences. Such a person treats his occupation with interest. He views his employer's business as his own. Every employee who works shoulder to shoulder with him is perceived by him as a member of the family. A responsible employee never says, “I don’t get paid for this.” When he is entrusted with some task, he completes it, and then talks to his superiors about paying both him and his colleagues for this work.
• The fourth level of responsibility is occupied by the local manager. Such a person is a manager who organizes the work of subordinates to achieve set goals. This person takes responsibility for himself and for others. He is not afraid to give orders and make serious decisions, on the correctness of which the fate of many depends. The local manager likes work less because he has to delegate it to his wards, who do it worse than he does. However, it is more correct to entrust it to employees rather than to do it yourself. The local manager organizes the work process in the area entrusted to him.
• The fifth level is intended for a director who supervises superiors for more than low level. This person is responsible for the business as a whole, while placing tactical decisions in the hands of his wards. It remains for him to formulate a strategy. A person of this level is able to open new directions or close existing ones. He is a professional who makes serious decisions. However, his level of responsibility is limited solely by the salary he receives and the prestigious position.
• The sixth level of responsibility is unique to the business owner. It is this person who organizes a business in which he invests his money, time and soul. He is able to be responsible for the results of his actions not only with finances, but also with his life. The owner is considering own business like his child, whom he raised for many years. He selects a director who can effectively manage his business, but at any time he can replace him with another. What's interesting, owner large company Rarely exposed in public. He is a kind of neck general director, which directs the latter to the right side. A business owner does not ask himself the question: “How to become a responsible person?” He is responsible by definition, since the well-being of an entire staff of employees and his own financial condition depend on him.

The above levels should not be considered positions. They represent levels of personality development. For example, a person holding the position of director large enterprise, from the personal-psychological side, he can be an ordinary specialist or performer. At the same time his secretary psychologically may well be the owner. There are often men who present themselves at work as effective leaders, and houses turn into dependents or executors. There are often cases when women housewives take full responsibility upon themselves, choosing for themselves the role of family owner. At the same time, they raise their husband as the head of the family.

Cultivating a sense of responsibility means teaching yourself to see your obligations, as well as being able to fulfill them and pay for the consequences. Moreover, the fee can be expressed in time or money. You must be able to pay for own mistakes even when there is no desire to do it.

Since developing responsibility right away can be difficult, you can perform the following tasks to acquire this quality:

• First of all, you need to make responsibility one of your values. You need to realize that this quality is a very important social skill that gives you a chance to significantly improve your life. Development of responsibility personality is a process that requires only your desire. You should have a desire to cultivate this quality in yourself. Take responsibility for your family life. Then you will be able to realize, for example, that the author of any resentment that arises in a relationship is only you.
• You can practice developing personal responsibility by asking yourself questions about what you can do now and what opportunities you have. It is very useful to replace demands like “I want” with questions about what needs to be done in order to get what I want.
• You can develop responsibility by asking yourself more often: “What should I do to be fully responsible for my actions?”
• Since developing a sense of responsibility alone is not always easy, you can choose a mentor(partner) who will reward and penalize you as necessary. It is better to select a person who can adequately assess your development and monitor your life activities. The partner will motivate you to follow a certain labor discipline without putting off any tasks for later.
• It will not be superfluous to send reports on your development to your partner remotely at a certain frequency. It is enough to do this 2 times a week. You can come up with fines for failure to meet deadlines and methods of rewarding for a responsible approach to this issue. By doing this for twenty-one days, you will be able to develop a healthy habit to some extent.

Now you know what it means to be a responsible person. With effort, you will soon notice certain changes in your life. Developing personal responsibility according to the above scenario will allow you to see good results in the near future.

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Any employer is looking for a responsible employee to join their team. But few people understand true meaning this word. Many people think that behind this term lies serious attitude and determination. In fact it's completely different concepts. Today you will learn how to become a responsible person in the family, at work, and how to be an example for others.

Professional activity

When applying for a job, you honestly write in your application form that you consider yourself a responsible person. Is it really? In most cases this a beautiful word man creates for himself more problems than he thinks. Already in the first days it will become clear whether this person is responsible or just decided to add a few points to himself at the interview. If you don’t want to get into a difficult situation, then read the tips that will help you change your attitude towards work and tell you how to become a serious and responsible person.

Honesty

The main thing and the most valuable quality any employee. You should not lie to your boss or colleagues, even if the situation forces you to do so. Sooner or later the deception will be revealed, and then there will be many more problems than there were initially. No one will be able to trust you anymore, and this is a direct path to the labor exchange in the near future. Before you lie, think a hundred times - is the game worth the candle and is it possible to avoid lying in in this case.

Subordination

Even if management considers you right hand And best employee, never allow yourself too much. Remember - this is work and there can be no friendly relations with the authorities. IN free time you can spend leisure time and celebrate holidays together. But at work, you shouldn’t cross the line and treat your immediate boss as a friend. This will increase your authority among your colleagues and will not make you a leader.

Questions

Don't hesitate to clarify any points you don't understand. It’s better to ask again than to do everything wrong. Nobody will think you are stupid. On the contrary, management values ​​employees who want to know as much as possible about the common cause.

Time

Don't put off until later things that need to be done by a clearly defined deadline. Anything can happen, and you will have to blush, explaining the reasons for your unprofessional behavior. A person who has failed once will never be trusted with a serious matter. There is no need to look for excuses for your misconduct - this will further damage your reputation.

Plan

If you don't know how to become a responsible person, then this advice should be taken into account first. Make a plan that you will stick to constantly. Put the most important things first and keep track of how much time you spend on certain actions. In the future, this will help not only to organize your working day correctly, but also to calculate your own strength.

An unbearable burden

Never grab every opportunity to prove your indispensability. Typing great amount tasks, you may not be able to cope with even half of them, and you will fail the management. Assess your strengths and try not to work to the detriment of your health. Nobody needs a sluggish and uninitiated employee. Even if you have a lot of merit in your past, everything can be ruined by one bad day.

Analysis

If you think about being a responsible person, then you are aware of all your mistakes. Reconsider your attitude towards life and analyze all your failures. This way you will understand where you made a mistake. Try to avoid repeating the unpleasant situation in the future. There is no need to look for those to blame for your problems - only you are responsible for your actions!

Doubts and don't know if you are a responsible person? Remember all your achievements that you did not receive by chance or luck, but earned through your own labor. Does everything suit you in life? A responsible person never goes with the flow - he regulates it with his desires.

How to become a responsible and independent person

Main principle victory over one's shortcomings - composure and organization. To accustom yourself to responsibility, you need to take on obligations and be able to fulfill your promises. First of all, this concerns family and close circle. The task is not easy, but it is a great incentive for further achievements.

Get used to it with early age clean up after yourself and keep in order not only personal belongings, but also the environment. Washing the dishes immediately after a meal will not be difficult, and putting your shoes in order after a walk will not seem like an overwhelming task. Remember how you felt when you returned to an untidy apartment. This will help drive away laziness and give a good incentive!

Don't forget that you need to do more than just what is asked. Noticed that no one took out the trash? Don't put this responsibility on others - do it yourself. This also applies to other things - cooking dinner, washing things, cleaning the apartment.

Relatives and friends

Never wait for people around you to ask for help. Feel free to offer it even if the situation does not require it. urgent intervention from the outside. One of the most important problems modern society- Lack of time. It is not enough even for personal needs, not to mention meetings with friends or relatives. Plan your activities so that you always have a window to talk with loved ones or spend time together regularly. Correspondence to in social networks cannot replace live communication with friends!

Don't forget about material obligations. Even if you have a strong desire to spend money on yourself, you should always remember the needs of your family. Perhaps you can easily do without purchasing, and this amount will become good addition in the family budget. Before disposing of funds, consult with your family and find out what they need now.

Thoughts and feelings

Before you say anything, think several times and put yourself in the shoes of your interlocutor. Words can hurt more than bladed weapons. Even if the conversation goes on raised voices, then there is no need to resort to insults. To stop the aggression and come to your senses, do a few deep breaths and count to ten in your head. It will immediately become easier, and you will understand that the problem is not worth wasting your energy on it and poisoning another person with offensive words.

Do not rush to express sympathy or criticize. Perhaps the person expected a completely different reaction from you. Project the situation that has arisen onto yourself, and it will become easier to come to the right decision.

Benefit to society

Responsibility is not just about obligations to colleagues, family or friends. It is important to remember that absolutely strangers and animals need your care. Don't shy away from volunteering or participating in community events. You can help not only financially, because for some, a kind word and feasible spiritual care are enough.

Remember that a responsible person always knows that, if not everything, then a lot depends on his actions. He will not spend much time on entertainment and devotes every free minute to necessary things. No matter what you do, you should have a schedule. Follow it, and after a few months you will get used to living at this rhythm, you will not want to return to your previous lifestyle and think about how to become a responsible person!

The Ultimate Guide to Responsibility: what is responsibility, what does it mean to be a responsible person, why is it important to be responsible, how to become a more responsible person? How to avoid feelings of guilt and anxiety due to excessive or hyperresponsibility? Learn the difference between responsibility and guilt. Also in this article we will tell you about what social responsibility is.

Responsibility: Complete Guide

Have you ever thought about what responsibility and irresponsibility are? What do we mean by responsibility? If you start thinking about it, pictures from your childhood will probably appear before your eyes. Children, when deciding whether they will obey their parents or not, and especially if they want to “challenge authority” (mom and dad), may hear in response: “You have to be responsible.”

If you ask a child what it means to be responsible, he will answer you something like “do everything well,” “listen to mom and dad,” “do your homework.” Adults use this term - "responsibility" - to make children understand and accept that they should behave well and do what their parents tell them.

Do you think responsibility is a little more than obligation? What comes to your mind when we talk about responsibility?

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What is responsibility? Definition

If we turn to the etymology of the word “responsibility”, we will see that it does not come from “obligation” at all. Russian word“responsibility” comes from “answer, decision”; in European languages ​​also - from the word “promise”.

Becoming a responsible person means learning to make conscious decisions and adopt behaviors that allow you to become better or help others become better. And most importantly, a responsible person understands and accepts the consequences of his own actions and solutions.

In dictionary Spanish RAE of the Royal Academy of the Spanish Language responsibility is defined as “the existing ability of any active subject of law to recognize and accept the consequences of a voluntary action”.

This definition especially emphasizes the need for a person to take responsibility for the possible negative consequences of his actions.

Being responsible: what does this give us?

Responsibility is very useful; it is not without reason that they say that “a responsible person is a free person.” A sense of responsibility can help you achieve your goals in any area of ​​life. Responsibility allows you to create your own value and take control of your life. Responsibility helps:

• Be more honest and decent: When we are inclined to tell the truth and keep our promises, people around us believe us, considering us honest and decent people.
• Be more independent: Accepting the consequences of our actions will help us make better decisions.
• Be highly trusted: People trust a responsible person more. But more importantly, we begin to trust ourselves more. We feel better when we do something right. And even if we make a mistake, we are satisfied because we know that we did our best in a given situation.

Responsibility as a value

Responsibility is taught from childhood. Both at home and at school, children need to be taught values.

Of course, everyone wants their partner to be decent and responsible, children to be able to take responsibility and not get into unpleasant situations, for parents and teachers to be responsible and take care of their children, for specialists to do their work responsibly. Why do we think that a person should be responsible?

Because the presence of such people nearby gives us a feeling of confidence and security. We think: “yes, he is responsible, he will do everything right.” The sense of security is one of basic needs according to Maslow's pyramid.

This is one of the reasons why responsibility is so positively valued in our society - because it gives us security, trust and a certain stability.

How to become more responsible?

There is no magic formula for becoming more responsible. However, it is possible to “train” and instill responsibility.

If you want to achieve something, fulfill your promises and obligations, you need, first of all, predisposition and. Since you have already read the article up to this point, you already have all this. I'll give you some additional tips and tricks. So how do you develop a sense of responsibility?

1. Set goals: It is important to understand why you are doing something. Understanding the meaning and direction of actions helps us to consciously continue to cope with our responsibilities. If you think your goal is too long-term, set small goals to achieve it. I recommend writing them down. It may sound stupid, but written down goals become real. Writing down your goals can help you become more accountable!
2. Be objective: What depends on me and what doesn’t? Write a list of what is up to you and what you can control. Your attention should be directed to these aspects, since you cannot be held responsible for what is not in your control.
3. Form good habits: If you find it difficult to “pull yourself together,” try organizing your daily routine. For example, plan to study for exactly an hour every day before watching a movie. This will help you, in addition, you will know for sure that the classes will take only an hour before watching, for example, your favorite TV series.
4. Reward yourself: Your inner ambitions are important here. If you have achieved your goal, why not acknowledge it? This is your moment of success, praise and pamper yourself!
5. Be honest with yourself: You are mistaken? The result depended only on you, but you couldn’t cope? Take responsibility, admit it. Analyze: why did something go wrong, how could you have done differently to achieve what you wanted?
6. Share your plans: No, no, this is not about publicly sharing your plans on social networks. I mean your loved ones. Best friend, mother, brother or sister. Tell them what you are up to and how you will do it. You will be able to get support from your closest and dearest people. In addition, it will already be awkward for you to deviate from your intended path.
7. Take action: What you can take responsibility for is your actions. For example, cleaning your room, turning in your work on time, preparing lunch, etc. This is a specific behavior that you can take responsibility for, but you Not you can bear the consequences. For example, no matter how well you prepare for a lesson, this does not guarantee you highest rating from the teacher, and just because you spent the whole day trying and preparing dinner doesn't mean your guests will necessarily like your food. It's not up to you. Therefore, just outline a plan of actions and tasks that you want to complete and have all the necessary resources for this, and act!

I don't want to deceive you. Becoming a responsible person takes time, desire and effort.

Remember that consistency is the key to success. Concentrate on your goal and you will succeed.

You can write your most important goals in capital letters, and sub-goals or mini-goals in regular letters below. Start gradually, step by step taking responsibility for certain actions or tasks.

Remember to take responsibility for all your actions. If something doesn't work out for you, don't punish yourself. Analyze the reasons, adjust the path, recognize the difficulties and start again.

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Responsibility and guilt

Guilt and responsibility are not the same thing. Being responsible for something does not mean being guilty. Be honest, how many times have you had to justify yourself by saying, “It’s not my fault!” in situations that you actually had no control over?

I'll tell you a story that may seem familiar to you. Imagine that early in the morning at home you saw a message on your phone from your boss with the following content: “The project urgently needs to be completed by 13:00. The client will arrive earlier. Everything must be perfect. And don’t even think about being late, this client is very important for our company and he won’t wait.”

You spend the whole morning rushing to finish the project and leave the house on time, even with some extra time so as not to be late. You take the train, but the train constantly stops between stations and is late. You begin to scold yourself: “I should have left earlier.” You realize that you are already about five minutes late. Next, you leave the platform and stumble upon some kind of rally. The street is blocked, it’s simply impossible to go directly, and you are forced to change the route, as a result of which you are another 15 minutes late, thinking: “Why did all this happen today?” Finally, you arrive at the office, wait for the elevator... You are 20 minutes late. “The client has probably already left, the boss will “kill” me,” you think. And then your dialogue with the boss:

• “I told you it was important to arrive on time! Look at the clock! Because of you, the client left just furious! This is entirely your fault!”
• “Do you think I did it on purpose? It’s not my fault that the train was very late, but because of the demonstration, half the area was blocked.

Let's figure out what's going on here.

You did everything you could. They showed understanding, made an effort, and were interested in a successful result. However, various external factors prevented you from arriving on time for the meeting. Let's evaluate this story.

• Question: What was your real responsibility? Answer: Present the completed project to the client at 1:00 p.m. Did you manage it? No.
• Question: Who is responsible for making the client angry? Answer: only the client himself, since we cannot control the emotions of other people. Are you responsible for this? No.

Being responsible for something and being guilty of something is not the same thing. What does guilt mean?

• Voluntary action: For someone to be guilty of something, that person must actively strive for a certain result.
• This result is negative. If you are guilty of something, this result carries a negative context.
• Guilt makes us think about cause and effect connections. Not everything in this life happens according to the “cause and effect” scheme. A given situation can be affected by many different various factors, as in the example discussed above. Moreover, even if we manage to somehow influence these factors, this does not mean that the result will be positive. In the example above, the person could be caught in a traffic jam or a subway strike, which would also prevent him from being on time for the meeting. Or the person could have committed some unintentional actions that could lead to a negative result (for example, accidentally erasing a finished project from the computer).

It is very important to understand that we often take responsibility for something that we cannot control or change with any of our efforts, feeling guilty for situations beyond our control, which exposes us to despair, worsens our mood and even makes us angry.

The same thing happens if we are accused of something. This seems unfair to us, because what happened was not part of our plans either. Before blaming someone, think about whether the person did it intentionally or not. First make sure that he did everything for which he was responsible in this situation.

Why is being irresponsible bad?

In social psychology, there is Weiner’s theory, the so-called “attribution theory.” Attribution is the attribution of certain characteristics to oneself or another person. Attribution theory is the study of how people interpret events, their causes and motives, and how this affects their thinking and behavior. By observing the behavior of another person, we try to understand the reasons for such behavior. Attributions influence our thinking and interaction with others, and, of course, situations with an assessment of responsibility.

Attributions are divided into:

1. External Attributions: when we look for an explanation/reason in external environment. Those. a person behaves this way because of the situation in which he finds himself. He is not responsible for this. For example, when we say “ don't make me nervous“, it’s as if we cannot control the situation and it is inevitable. Many people use external attributions to avoid responsibility. Another example of such expressions: "I was not lucky". By using this phrase, we thereby want to convey the idea that despite the fact that we have all the resources and abilities to achieve the optimal result, it so happened by chance that the result turned out to be negative = we are not responsible for this.
2. Internal attributions: when we look for an explanation/reason within ourselves. Those. we explain a person's behavior internal properties, character, worldview, etc. For example, when we achieve success we say: “It's all thanks to me”, “I did it“. But even with negative consequences For another person, we also use internal attributions, thereby recognizing that we somehow influenced the situation: “I’m very sorry”, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you”.

It is clear that the attribution style a person uses can greatly influence his self-perception and even his happiness. For example, if a person is shy due to modesty or does not recognize his successes, he will have low self-esteem and will think that his achievements do not depend on him. Conversely, a person who constantly takes credit for themselves will appear to be an arrogant narcissist.

What happens if you use internal attribution to negative results and external – for the positive? Exactly the same.

Therefore, you need to be consistent and objective. It is important to understand and take responsibility for what we do poorly, but we also need to enjoy our own successes. This will give us emotional balance and have a positive effect on self-esteem.

Responsibility as a social value

When we talk about social values, we mean specific specific principles established in a particular society, the correct and conflict-free observance of which contributes to well-being.

Responsibility as a social value affects relationships with others, as well as with oneself:

Agreement

One aspect of responsibility as a social value is agreement. We negotiate all the time. At home, at work, with friends, with family. Negotiating means making promises and keeping them.

It's interesting, but often we fail to agree with ourselves. For example, we promise ourselves: “Starting Monday I’ll go on a diet and start exercising”, “Today I’m busy, and tomorrow I’ll start studying”. “I will go to the gym three times a week, without skipping.” Surely you are familiar with this and you also probably promised yourself this, but never did. Don't you think this is strange? Why does it happen that we don’t even do what we promised ourselves? Are we so loyal to ourselves that we forgive ourselves for it? Imagine what will happen if:

• “Grandma, I will come on Monday and help you.” But you don't come.
• “Today I work, and tomorrow, son, I will help you with your homework.” But you are not helping.
• “I’ll do three classes at the gym.” But you don't show up.

Does responsibility to others seem more important to you than responsibility to yourself?

Liabilities

The next aspect of responsibility as a social value is obligations. We already mentioned the topic of obligations at the beginning of the article. This is what we are taught to do from childhood. At every stage of life, every year, we have to learn and take on certain obligations and responsibilities to the society in which we live and develop.

Very often such obligations are not voiced; they are accepted as if on their own. Surely this has happened to you: if you do, for example, some work around the house, because you at some point decided to do it, other family members begin to think that you will always do this? For example: mom always uploads washing machine, dad is shopping, brother is walking the dog, I’m setting the table.”

What happens if one day mom returns late from work? - There will be no clean linen.

What happens if your brother forgets to walk the dog? - She will write in the house.

What happens if the father cannot buy groceries? - We will be left without food.

Of course, these examples may seem extreme because, as a rule, such household responsibilities alternate. But sometimes it happens, and it starts: “Mom, I don’t have a clean T-shirt,” “Dad, you didn’t buy mine.” favorite cookies”, “Ivan, you are punished today because the dog peed in the house!” Remember similar situations from your life.

Strength of will

Willpower can be defined as the ability, over a certain period of time, to make efforts and sacrifice something in order to achieve a goal, the implementation of which will bring us great pleasure.

If the goal is short-term, it is much easier to exercise willpower. Therefore, to maintain willpower, it is useful to break the main goal into several subgoals, this will make it easier to maintain willpower during long period time.

Psicóloga Sanitaria especialista en Psicología clínica.
Enamorada de las relaciones entre pensamientos, emociones y comportamiento humano.
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