Life after a breakup. “Personal hell” or a new reality? How to get over a breakup

Breaking up often causes despair, sadness and pain... But when the situation cannot be changed, change your attitude towards it.

Then you will begin to experience completely different emotions.

Scientists have calculated that the experience of parting with a loved one can last from three months to three years. And so that life does not seem torment at the moment of experiencing a breakup, you need to learn to think correctly.

The right way of thinking

The most difficult, but also the most expedient thing you can do is to accept what happened. To be indignant over an event that has already happened is, to say the least, unreasonable. It's the same as complaining about rain or heat. It's better to be able to adapt.

Analyze the situation. Since there are two people in a relationship and your partner no longer wants your company, it means that this is your fault. You need to fully understand your mistakes so as not to repeat them again. It is also important to understand that the other person has the right to choose an action, that he does not owe you anything, and is not obliged to meet your expectations. You should not hold grudges, accumulate anger and reproaches, since these emotions do not provide the opportunity to enjoy life and develop. In addition, resentment and anger do not allow you to easily and naturally enter into new relationships. Try to forgive your ex-partner.

Despite the fact that by nature itself a woman’s soul has the desire to start a family, to love and be loved, very often people break up. And it doesn’t matter at all who is to blame for this, because pain arises in the soul both when a loved one turns out to be an unworthy person, and when the one who swore his love suddenly leaves. In order not to lose faith in yourself, not to be disappointed, you need to survive the breakup, no matter who initiated it. Just don’t let everything take its course, if you don’t start fighting for your peace of mind in time, you can lose your balance for a long time and lose the joy of life.

How to get over a breakup with your loved one

The first feeling that arises after hearing “I’m leaving you” is misunderstanding and denial of what is happening. Only after a few days pain fills the entire soul, making it difficult to live and forcing one to plunge deeper into the abyss of despair. Then comes anger and rage towards the one who dared to betray and humiliate. When the first wave passes, a period of self-flagellation begins, the woman begins to look for all conceivable and inconceivable shortcomings in herself. It seems to her that it is her fault that everything happened this way, that she is unworthy of being loved. The most dangerous thing is to come to the conclusion that all men are deceivers and traitors. Sometimes this helps to cope with pain, but it can not only lead to deterioration in self-esteem, but also cause problems in your personal life in the future. When such thoughts appear, think about the men who definitely do not deserve such words.

So before you make any decisions about what to do next, allow yourself to cry and suffer. Remember, swear, throw out emotions in any way. When you feel emotionally drained, begin to restore your peace of mind. If you feel like you can’t calm down, take a blank sheet of paper and write everything you think on it. Then tear it into small pieces and throw away. Immediately after this you will feel peace.

But so that the pain does not reassert itself, change your attitude towards what happened. Remember that everyone is given their strength. Everything that happens is necessary for our development, awareness of what is important in life, for the ability to cope with a variety of problems that arise in life, regardless of what you do and how you try to prevent them. In the end, no one died or got sick. Apperciate things which you have. Live here and now. Think about what you have and how you live. You 100% have something to enjoy every second.

Look at everything that is happening from the outside, analyze everything that happened, as if you were an outside observer in this situation. And maybe, finally, you will see that there is no one to suffer for. And your pain is not due to the fact that you broke up with your loved one, but to the fact that you were left alone. Very often, the desire to return a man at any cost is associated with the fear of loneliness, and not with strong feelings.

Stop being afraid and start fighting loneliness by changing yourself and your worldview. No one but you can help you cope with loneliness. Even marriage does not affect your inner state in any way, and you may experience melancholy and loneliness while married. Loneliness lies within a person and has nothing to do with his social status.

Think about what new opportunities open up for you after a breakup. Now you don’t have to constantly collect dirty socks, cook food, remind you to take out the trash or fix the bathroom faucet. You can take up your favorite hobby, learn a foreign language, enroll in driving or programming courses, go on a trip or vacation, regardless of whether a man likes your choice. Remember your innermost dreams. Maybe it's time to implement them. In any negative situation, learn not to dwell on the negative, but, first of all, look for the positives. There are no hopeless situations, there is only the wrong attitude towards them.

To survive a breakup, it is necessary not to take revenge on your former loved one, but to fight with yourself, your grievances, and your reluctance to admit that others have the right to choose. Focus on yourself, forget about those who left and could not appreciate you. Try to realize that this has already happened and nothing can be returned. Take this for granted and think about what should be done right now at this moment. Remember, working on yourself is the most difficult work. You can’t become limp, you need to work on yourself every minute, every second.

Since you had to go through a breakup, it means that life gave you a gift, demonstrating that this is not the person you need. To make sure of this, try returning it. But if you still can’t do this in six months, then don’t waste any more personal time on this person. It is enough to understand one truth: what is ours does not leave us, what goes away is not ours. If you separated, it means that this person is simply not yours, you went through a joint test and gained certain experience. Let him go calmly and move forward.

No matter what happens, no matter how much you love a person, you don’t need to despair if he leaves. There is always a way out of this situation. Firstly, you have a chance to get him back (just take this issue very seriously, you can’t mend a broken cup, the returned relationship will most likely not last very long), secondly, find something positive in this, and Thirdly, gain experience by becoming wiser. Eastern philosophy says that someone new always comes to the vacant place. The end of something is always the beginning of something new and pure. Treat what happened as another challenge and an important life lesson, and move on. Your happiness will definitely find you, the main thing is to remain a Man with a capital H.

The question of how to survive a breakup becomes relevant if a person was not ready for this event and he did not want to part with his beloved partner. However, the tendency of modern love couples is such that breakups happen much more often than we would like. People often get together because of interest or without feeling true love for each other. That is why ridiculous quarrels or minor problems quickly separate loving partners, leading to the destruction of relationships.

Since we are talking about relationships that are not yet burdened with official registration, the breakup occurs quite quickly. Yesterday you were still together, and today your loved one packed up his things and left you forever. Now you may never see or hear him. This is how relationships break down, especially if you don't expect it.

Here, experts from the psychological help website advise you to approach the situation philosophically. Many modern couples break up over the slightest trifle or because the partners are tired of each other. Be wise so as not to run after anyone and not to drive yourself into depression. And the most important thing to understand in this situation is that love actually does not last forever.

Nothing lasts forever. There is no love that will exist between two people forever. There are no relationships that will last forever. There is no job that a person must do forever. Judge for yourself: even your interests change over time. You give up what previously interested you. And that's okay.

Many people have suffered because of the idea that something should last forever. There are people who work in jobs they don’t like just because they once received an education, and now they don’t even think about changing anything in their lives. There are families where the husband and wife have not loved each other for a long time, but continue to live together because they follow traditions. There are men and women who are offended by the whole world because they once loved, but were betrayed or deceived.

Nothing lasts forever on this planet. Nothing lasts forever in man himself. Then, why dream that all the benefits you desire will be eternal in your life?

Once upon a time you were little. You had favorite toys. But you abandoned even them when you grew up and realized that you no longer needed them. What would happen if you didn't give up your favorite toys? There are people who cannot throw away what they don't need. But how do they live?

If you do not accept the simple law that you don’t need to hold on to anything, as it comes, so it goes, you are dooming yourself to disappointment and suffering. The person who suffers is the one who does not want to say goodbye to what bothers him, is unnecessary and only drags him into the past. What will happen if you give up everything that is left in the past and that no longer helps you live happily? Then your life will become much happier and more harmonious.

Why is it difficult and sometimes unbearable to survive a breakup? Psychologists draw readers' attention to the fact that every person during separation goes through the stages of normal loss, which include:

1. Disagreement with what happened. At first, a person simply cannot believe what happened to him. He continues to hope, expects that his other half will show up, call, come back, makes plans and remembers his loved one.
2. Anger. At the second stage, when a person begins to understand that the breakup has become inevitable and irreversible, he begins to get angry. Here he begins to look for those to blame for what happened, blaming himself for all the troubles, then blaming his former partner. Also here, plans often arise on how to harm or take revenge on the ex-partner for leaving.
3. Bargain. At the third stage, when the awareness of the breakup of the relationship becomes obvious, the person comes to terms a little with the fact that they abandoned him or did not run after him to return him, he begins to bargain in his mind with himself or his former partner. He imagines the ex-partner returning and begging to come back to him, where he makes demands on the basis of which he will have mercy on him. He gives himself a time frame during which he will still agree to return to his former partner if he suddenly shows up and wants to resume the relationship.
4. Depression. At the last stage, when a person begins to more clearly realize that the old relationship cannot be returned, he falls into depression, apathy, melancholy, and disappointment. He stops feeling the taste of life for a while. We can say that at this time the meaning of life is lost. However, when the next stage of loss comes - acceptance, then the person will be able to start a new life.

All people go through these stages when they lose something important to themselves. However, it should be understood that a new life always begins when a person says goodbye to the old. It is impossible to live in a new, happy way if a person drags with him something old, unnecessary, burdensome. The new life will not be new, but a continuation of the old one, the person will simply convince himself of the opposite. Therefore, in order to survive a breakup, you need to put an end to it yourself and come to terms with what happened in order to continue living without remembering the past.

Easier said than done. And here the following advice will help: to say goodbye to the past, see how it makes you unhappy, takes away your strength, deprives you of desires, health and energy. You “die” while you hold on to the past. This is akin to lying all day long under the scorching sun, which will bake you, or going hungry when there is a lot of food in the refrigerator.

Answer yourself the question: why do you allow something to “kill” you, deprive you of energy and life? It is you who allow all this to happen to you because you do nothing to please yourself.

Understand how the past poisons you and deprives you of happiness, finally wish to please yourself and start taking care of yourself. Stop thinking about someone. Finally, think about yourself - the only ones who will always be with you and whom you should not let down. Take actions that will give you happiness. This will show you love for yourself.

To quickly get over a breakup, you need to:

1. To wish to live a new life, and not remember the past. This desire must be real and manifest itself in appropriate actions.
2. Realize how miserable your ex-partner is making your life. Why think about him if everything he does for you now brings you suffering? You don’t think about enemies or unpleasant people who cause you harm! Then why do you remember your ex-partner, who also brings you nothing but suffering?
3. Stop blaming anyone and getting angry. What happened happened, the former partner has his own plans for the future, which he has the right to implement. And if you are not in these plans, then your life should exclude this person. Don't run after anyone and don't wait for anyone. Everyone who needs you will come. In the meantime, don’t waste your time on empty hopes.

How to survive a breakup with a man?

It is quite difficult to maintain calm and balance if a woman is experiencing a breakup with a man. Psychologists do not advise you to renounce your past in an instant and pretend that nothing happened in your life.

However, do not let the situation take its course. Make an effort to help yourself get out of the hole and start a new life:

• Imagine yourself as a happy woman who does not remember the past. Put on a mask and feel this state vividly. Over time, you will stop suffering because of the departed.
• Start loving yourself. Only those women who forget about themselves, because they do not love and do not value themselves, suffer from broken relationships and abandoned men. It's time to fix it because it's your problem. Start respecting and appreciating yourself as the most precious thing you have in this life (because it is). If you don't take care of yourself, no one will take care of you.
• Praise yourself for the slightest achievements. You need to increase your self-esteem and restore faith in yourself. If you achieve something or cope with some problems, then praise yourself every time you celebrate this event.
• Don't blame your ex for anything. As long as you are offended and angry with him, you cannot forget about him. It's your problem. Let him live the way he wants.
• Don't talk to your friends about the past. Try not to blame, justify or in any way analyze the behavior of your former gentleman. This topic should be uninteresting to you, so do not answer questions and do not touch on the topic of a man.
• Change your attitude towards ending a relationship. You have been told that you must suffer in this situation. But see the positives in what happened: now you have free time, the restrictions that your former boyfriend set have disappeared. Now you can do things that you didn’t have time for before. Now no one limits you in anything - rejoice in it!

Don't try to quickly find a replacement for your ex-man. Here you will only attract scoundrels who will take advantage of the fact that you need them. It’s better to captivate yourself with some activities, worries or interests. And if you meet a man who you really like, then think about starting a relationship with him.

How do men cope with a breakup?

The breakup of a relationship is sometimes more difficult for men than for the better half. Men just don't show their emotions, which can make them seem like they're feeling good about themselves. If a man is active, then he may begin to get involved in various extreme sports, get angry, and get into fights. If a man is passive, then he can experience a breakup, resorting to alcohol abuse and temporary relationships with available women. In other words, to some extent a man will harm himself while he suffers.

Psychologists note that dependent people experience more difficult breakups. They don't love themselves, so they look for love from other people. It seems to them that only in a relationship with someone can they be happy, and all because they themselves do nothing to achieve happiness.

To survive a breakup, an addicted person needs to:

1. Start loving yourself. And a person who loves himself will never suffer for those who do not love him, reject him, harm him, do not want to be around, etc.
2. Start achieving your own happiness. Don't wait for someone to make you happy, but please yourself.

All people go through breakups. It is quite rare for anyone to say that they have chosen their favorite partner for life the first time. You should understand that life is short, and you should not waste it on suffering. Don't do things that cause you suffering. Instead of running after your ex-passion and following her life, it’s better to start filling your life with interesting activities and hobbies, meeting friends and making new acquaintances. If you like a person, then you can start a relationship with him. However, there is no need to specifically look for anyone!

How to ultimately survive a breakup?

In order to ultimately survive a breakup, you need to understand that it is not life that has ended, but another stage. Just as you once finished and left school, in the same way you ended a love relationship in order to start others later. There is no need to regret anything and make yourself a victim.

When a relationship falls apart, even if the person himself wants it, separation is very difficult. To survive a breakup without falling into deep trouble, pull yourself together and follow the time-tested recommendations of psychologists.

1. Let yourself be sad

Is your relationship over? Then allow yourself to be a little sad, and don’t try to immediately get distracted, not paying attention to what happened, immersing yourself in work. Lock yourself at home and listen to your favorite music or invite friends over, talk it out, cry into someone’s vest, finally! However, do not get carried away and, locked within four walls, do not intend to cherish the loss for a long time.

2. Burn all your bridges

Knowing that the relationship has ended and it is impossible to renew it, get rid of everything that is associated with it: gifts, photographs, things reminiscent of the previous relationship. You can, of course, dramatically get rid of a given ring or gold bracelet, but don’t go to extremes. You can return valuable gifts to your ex-lover, take them to a pawnshop, or put them in a distant drawer along with shared photographs, making a promise to yourself not to look there for six months or a year.

Don’t console yourself with the hope that people get back together after breaking up. No one leaves unexpectedly. Your husband may rashly (after a spontaneous quarrel) run out of the house and go to a friend, but he will definitely return. Emotional moments like these even strengthen a marriage. But the breakup of a long-term relationship occurs consciously - this decision is made with a cool head, in a calm state.

3. Ask loved ones for help

Do you have any idea how to cope with a breakup with your loved one on your own? There is no need to do this. Frequent communication with friends, acquaintances and colleagues will help relieve you from unnecessary worries. Alternatively, you can either start communicating on social networks with people who have managed to successfully survive a breakup.

Don't hide that you feel bad, don't be shy to ask for advice or help. This is better than withdrawing into yourself, undermining your mental state and falling into depression.

4. Find a reason to be happy

Telling how to survive a breakup with a loved one, psychologists advise finding a way to cheer yourself up. You can do what you love, start home renovations, give yourself “time of development and change” every day - it will be going to the gym, taking courses or reading books or writing poetry. Pleasant activities like these will help you take your mind off things and fill you with positivity.

5. Be irresistible

After a breakup, people can regain the meaning of life and be happy, so don’t give up on yourself. Many women make a big mistake in such a situation: they stop taking care of their appearance. But it’s still more pleasant to be sad with a beautiful manicure and impeccable hairstyle. Do you want to start a new relationship after a breakup or, conversely, get your husband back? Or do you not need anyone and want to live for yourself? In any case, stay on top. Regularly visit a beauty salon, gym, change your hairstyle, do yoga or take a massage course.

6. Set new goals for yourself

How to survive a breakup with a man and forget about him? Review your plans, because when there are two of us, we follow common guidelines and constantly make compromises. If you wanted to, but your loved one was against it, then now is the time to pack your bags. Have you ever decided to quit and change your profession or, for example, buy a car? Take action! Now no one will bother you.

Understand the main thing - your life depends only on you. And it’s up to you to decide what it will be like.

7. Experiment

A new relationship or getting rid of pain after a breakup will not keep you waiting if, instead of falling into depression, you enjoy life, develop, and attend events. Bold experiments will help you with this. For women this is a radical change in image, for men it is moving or buying new furniture. Or did you secretly dream of dancing, but were shy?

So the end of a relationship is the perfect time to find a new hobby.

8. Forgive and let go

It is difficult for a woman thinking about how to survive a breakup with a man to imagine that she will be able to forgive him. Wait. But over time, such a moment will inevitably come. You will feel that you are forgiving and letting the person go, because you respect his choice and do not wish him harm.

After a breakup, you should not pursue the person and try to find out which of you two is to blame. Maintain your dignity and don't forget about your pride. Do not take revenge for the insult caused to you - this way you will let your ex-lover understand that he is right in his decision to leave you. It is better to leave ended relationships in the past, perceiving them as a stage of development on the path to better things.

And finally, a piece of advice. Do not rush to start new romances: until you get rid of the old love shackles and understand yourself, you will not be able to build a full-fledged new relationship.

Usually a person begins to suffer very much when his relationship breaks down. And it is not surprising, since we are talking about emotional attachment to another person with whom one was not yet ready to part. You can compare the breakup of a relationship with money: when you are ready to part with it, that is, to spend it, you do it more easily than in those moments when you lose money or are taken away from you, when you are not ready to part with it. Experts give advice on the online magazine website on how to survive a breakup, which is always a painful and tragic event.

The easiest ones are those who initiate the separation. However, not everything is clear here either. Absolute ease after the breakup of the union is experienced only by the person who was already prepared for this event. Typically, readiness to break up can be determined by the following signs:

1. Lack of interest in the other person.
2. Lack of desire to see him, hear him and spend time with him.
3. Absolute indifference to everything that happens to him.
4. Even the absence of a partner who can flirt and sleep with someone.

If no feelings arise towards your partner, then it’s time to break up with him. And the person here actually feels relieved after the breakup, because it feels like he has taken off an extra burden.

The events experienced by the initiator of the breakup are a little more tragic if he did it out of stupidity or was forced to do so. For example, his partner cheated on him, which he cannot forgive (however, feelings for him remain). Or the woman broke off the relationship out of emotion, which often happens, and then, when she calmed down, she realized the stupidity of her action. If it is impossible to return what you lost by mistake, then the suffering intensifies.

The most vivid emotions are experienced by the person who did not initiate the breakup. He might not have realized that tragedy was looming. He could guess, but try not to think about it. Usually, a breakup occurs during quarrels, when the partner can no longer stand it and, out of emotion, reveals his desire to dissolve the relationship. At first, those who have broken up with them may think that their breakup is only temporary. However, when time passes and the partner does not return, moreover, it is impossible to return him, then the emotions of grief intensify.

Experts attribute the breakup of a relationship to the same losses in a person’s life as the death of a loved one or the loss of a large amount of money that has been saved for many years. Imagine a situation when you give your years, strength and all your resources and feelings to a person, and he suddenly breaks off the relationship. The pain intensifies even more if it turns out that the person was not just broken up with, but replaced with another partner. Self-esteem suffers greatly when a person finds out that a former partner has left for another.

Experiencing a breakup goes through 5 stages of development. At each stage, a person experiences a certain set of emotions. They are all natural and should be experienced. A problem can only arise if a person gets stuck at one of the stages and cannot complete it for a long time.

1. Non-acceptance. The person cannot come to terms with what happened; moreover, he does not yet believe that the relationship no longer exists. He continues to dream of a future where he and his partner are together. He continues to act as if the relationship still exists. He continues to lead the same routine when he is forced to devote time and attention to his partner. Any thoughts that the relationship no longer exists are not yet taken seriously.
2. Aggression. When the first understanding of what happened comes, the person begins to get angry. Here he begins to look for those to blame and lash out at everyone who gets his hands on it. He may consider himself to blame, or his former partner, or those around him, or circumstances.
3. Bargain. Next, the person begins to bargain as he realizes that the relationship is broken. Who is he bargaining with? With myself. He imagines situations when his former soulmate tries to return to him, enjoys her humiliation and pleas, while holding his head proudly and begins to make demands. He can negotiate with himself how long he will suffer and love his ex-partner if he suddenly wants to return.
4. . When all previous actions remained meaningless, unrealized, happening only in the head, a person begins to realize even more what happened. The realization of the absence of a relationship causes a person to become depressed. This is the so-called stage of humility, when a person begins to clearly see what happened, feel pain because of it and gradually resign himself.
5. New life. When a person has gone through all the previous stages, has played enough with his emotions and possible options for events, and comes to terms with the irrevocable departure of his ex-partner, he begins to realize that he is wasting his time on groundless and unnecessary experiences. While he suffers, his time is running out. He might already be interested in another person, he could spend his energy on something more useful. When a person understands that it is time to stop suffering from the past and need to start living in the present and future, then he moves on to a new life.

How to survive a breakup?

Not a single psychologist will say that a breakup is easy to survive. While a person goes through the stages of awareness and acceptance of the situation, tries to get his ex back and suffers enough, a lot of time will pass. For some it takes several months, for others even years. Getting over a breakup will not be easy if your feelings for your ex-partner have not cooled down and everything happened against your will.

First, you need to deal with your own feelings that were hurt by your ex-partner who broke off or contributed to the breakup of the relationship. Surely there is a sense of pride and ego that is hurt, which says that no one can leave you, everyone loves and appreciates you. When the situation shows the opposite, a person primarily suffers because he was rejected, not appreciated, humiliated, and not because of any other reasons.

Then the person needs to realize that the breakup of the relationship forces him to change his usual way of life. Suffering does not arise because another person leaves, but because the absence of a relationship forces a person to change his habits that have worked and been implemented in his life for so long. He suffers because of his new life, which does not allow him to live as before.

To survive a breakup, psychologists recommend not returning your ex-partner. If all the dots are in place, your ex-partner has clearly stated his desire to never be with you again, you need to accept it. Moreover, you need to stop being interested in your partner’s life, follow him, find out about him from mutual friends. Until your heart grows cold towards the past, you should minimize all sources that may remind you of it. And then, when the feelings completely subside, you can be interested, if you want.

While you are just going through a breakup, psychologists recommend thinking about the reasons for what happened. This will allow you to no longer repeat the mistakes that you personally made. It doesn't matter what the ex-partner's fault is. This is his choice and his mistakes, for which he will be personally responsible. Your task is to understand what you were wrong about, which is why the relationship broke down. When you start a new relationship, this will allow you to no longer experience such a break in the union.

How can a woman survive a breakup with a man?

Men and women experience relationship breakups differently. Let's consider what a woman can do to survive the breakup of a union with a man:

1. Put on the mask of a successful woman. Yes, you feel sad and unpleasant. However, you should save your face. Don't be discouraged, continue to admire yourself. Perhaps while you are suffering, a man will pass by you who could be interested in you, but did not because you were upset, whiny and ugly.
2. Let go of your ex. Gradually you should let the man go into the past. Don’t blame him for anything, try to talk less about him with friends and remember. Just let the person live the way he wants, even if he is not happy next to you.
3. Start making new plans. You suffer because you still do not let go of the past. However, time passes. If you want to stop holding on to what has long been in the past, start dreaming about the future. These plans should include you and the man with whom you are not yet building a relationship. Imagine how you will relax, work and live together with another man.
4. Do what was previously prohibited. Relationships always presuppose that your partner forbids you to do something: put on makeup, go to nightclubs, flirt with men, devote time to work, etc. Surely your man also forbade you to do something. Now that you have broken up, realize those desires that you could not fulfill before.
5. Chat with new people. Once you have become free, then allow yourself to meet new people. Continue to communicate with friends and relatives, and enjoy making new contacts with people you don’t yet know. This will allow you to quickly forget your ex.

Please note that you are not recommended to start a new relationship just to forget about the old one. If you are not interested in a new man and are not in love with him, then you should not get into a relationship, as it always ends in tears.

How can a man survive a breakup with a woman?

Despite the calm expression on his face, a man experiences a breakup no less emotionally than a woman. He may suffer greatly if the relationship breaks up suddenly and for unknown reasons. Often a man begins to become an alcoholic, putting his life at risk by driving fast or entering into various conflict situations with other men. A man suffers, so he often punishes himself for this. Why? Because he was dependent on a woman, which is a consequence of not loving himself.

How can a man cope with a breakup?

1. Restore self-respect. A man must start by loving and valuing himself. If a woman couldn’t appreciate a person like you, then that’s her problem.
2. Remember that life is short, so it’s pointless to waste time worrying and suffering for a person who won’t appreciate it anyway. Value your life above some experiences and personality of another person.
3. Engage in self-improvement. Surely your self-esteem has dropped a little due to the woman leaving. It seemed to you that you were somehow not good for her. In fact, the woman could have left for other reasons. However, you now have time to make yourself better: start playing sports, improving professionalism, mental abilities, etc.
4. Take care of yourself. And start by stopping hurting yourself with your thoughts.
5. Stop stalking your ex. In general, try not to be interested in her. Why do you need this?
6. Meet new people. There is no need to start a new relationship if no one is interested in you yet. Simply communicating with people who do not know what happened to you will be enough.

How to finally get over a breakup?

If the relationship has broken down, you should accept it. Be mindful of how you spend your time and be accountable for your decisions. Don't feel sorry for yourself, it will only make your worries worse. Remember that you do not have to suffer because of a breakup, as is customary in society. You can throw away your worries and not pay attention to them.